Bad Sun Rising

     I didn't know how empty life was until I met Scarlett.

 

     My grandfather is a very rich man. By contrast, my father was a very poor man. Since the two never got along, my pops left home and joined the marines so that he could send paychecks to his new bride. When he died, my grandfather extended an olive branch to my mother who said that he could visit us and that we could spend weekends and holidays together. Hell, he could walk me to the bus stop, or pick me up from school if he wanted, but he was out of his mind if he thought we were going to be accepting his charity.

 

     As I got older, I started to see why pops had to leave to become his own man. Everything with my grandfather came with a condition. My parent's world was small and down to earth, but rewarding, while my grandfather's world had tedious customs and was run entirely by money. Somehow, I still became his beneficiary, probably because I was his only grandson. My second cousins were suited more to the throne than I was. I guess if you're going to inherit the Julian estate, you have to be a specific kind of man. He clearly wanted me to go to an ivy league school, like my cousins, and at the very least, learn enough to be able to manage all of his charities. After all, it didn't matter if I could run his company. Ownership would be transferred to me regardless.

 

     I didn't want any of it. I wanted to be a man that my dad could be proud of and he wasn't around anymore to give his opinion on the matter. Still, I did what I imagined would make him proud, and to me that met doing the exact thing my grandfather did not want me to do. Join the marines. I didn't stay there very long. The military wakes you up pretty quick and I saw the benefits of college where I got a degree in computer science before joining with a private military company. I avoided my family as much as I could, but any soldier knows that no matter how careful you are, sometimes you just can't avoid battle. This time was mama's fault. You can fight off insurgents, but you're screwed when it's your own that betrays you. 

 

     It wasn't that I was angry at my grandfather, but the more I was around them, the more disappointed I was. They were such high achieving people who could be so much more than they were, but they didn't give two fucks about each other. All they wanted to do was the wealthy lifestyle they were born to and then congratulate themselves at charity functions over champaigne. My grandfather didn't want most of the family to know that he was sick, even though he, very publicly, demanded I get married before he died so he would know who was going to inherit his property. He said if I wasn't married by thirty, he was going to give it to my oldest second cousin. I always assumed Gavin would be CEO of grandpop's company one day, why shouldn't he inherit the estate too?

 

     "A high class resort and spa," Gavin said. "Take a drink, Julian."

 

     "A spa?" I echoed. I don't drink champagne, it's too sweet and bubbly. If I want bubbles in my drink, I'm going to have a soda, or a beer, like a proper man.

 

     "A scotch then. Do something with those hands," Gavin replied and it was then I realized that I was clenching and unclenching my fists over and over again. Gavin directed me to where the more gender appropriate drinks were and another cousin caught me fiddling with my neck tie.

 

     Charlotte tsked me and then reached out to straighten the black noose with her nimble fingers. She was one of the few people I could stand being with in the same room.

 

     "Do you know what they're trying to do?" I asked her gruffly. 

 

     Although she spoke sympathetically, she had a devious smile. "So you've met your eligible bachelorettes? Don't worry, I tried to make sure only good ones were selected. You do like the Cowboys, don't you?"

 

     "You didn't." I looked down accusingly at the innocent eyes staring back at me. No one likes the Cowboys. They're only watched for the Cowgirls, if you know what I mean. "What did I do to deserve that?"

 

     "You bailed on your second cousin's once removed birthday party, which I can't believe, since she's your favorite Julian. After all, you two have the same maturity level," Charlotte scolded me. "You were supposed to play Red Rover."

 

     "Well." I scuffed my nicely polished dress shoes on the wooden floor. Appropriately chastized, I mumbled, "You said I can't play that anymore. I get too tactical."

 

     "When you are playing with four year olds, Julian, it would be nice for you to keep their age in mind." Charlotte smacked my hand as I reached for my neck tie again, and then sent me on my way.  

 

      I joined Gavin again, this time joined by grandpops and his lovely news that I had one year to marry, or Gavin could turn the estate to into a resort for people who only worked half the year. Our family had lived there for generations and he wanted to put in an eighteen hole golf course. I remember leaving that function before the dinner actually started. For once, it had something other to do with than just Gavin. There were too many women who couldn't appreciate a good football team. I popped a few appetizers- sorry, hors d'oeuvre- in my mouth and finished my pre-dinner whiskey, wishing it was something more bottom shelf, something that would burn a whole straight through me. 

 

     Private, intimate affair for grandpop's birthday, my ass. Mama lied to me. Not only did she not show up herself, it was definitely the opposite of a private, intimate gathering with my second cousin introducing me to business men from countries I was a little too rustic to be able to pronounce. When I confronted her about it later, in the same leaky-piped house she had lived in for the past twenty-five years, she shrugged and claimed innocence. She agreed with my grandfather that it was time to get married and being my mother, she was automatically blameless in all affairs. 

 

     From the function, I made my way over to the metro, loosening that damn neck tie and slipping it off. It felt so great to sit down in one of the seats that stretched lengthwise along the car, right in front of girl who was curled up in a window. Of course, I noticed she was pretty, though given the ugly personalities I had just been around, anyone would have been modelesque. When I really looked at her, the first thing I noticed was her bright blue eyes, looking forlorn out the window. I couldn't blame her given the dismal view of the underground platform she had to gaze upon. Such pretty eyes should get to look at something equally as beautiful, like the pond on my grandfather's estate. Though social convention dictates that we must all avoid eye contact and disperse until we have to double up our seating out of necessity, I turned to her and leaned in to say, "Bad day?"

 

     Without looking at me, she nodded. Maybe social convention would forgive our communication if she didn't actually look at me. "I lost my inheritance, what about you?" I inquired. I was ready to celebrate the fact and she looked like she was in need of cheering up.  

 

     "I'm going to die," she whispered, her breath fogging the glass for just a second, throwing her words back at her. More to the window than to me, she said, "We're both having quite the day. We'd make a good couple."

 

     I knew the smile on my face was big and stupid. I asked her anyway, "Yeah, why?"

 

     "Misery loves company," she answered obviously.  

 

     "Then do you want to get married?" I asked.

 

     As soon as I said it, I knew what an ass I was. The joke only made sense to me, since she didn't know the one year stipulation to get married that I was given, not to mention the severity of her situation. Money can be regained, saving a life is much harder. I should have said that I was sorry, or offered positive encouragement, but it just slipped out. I guess my family had rubbed off on me and I didn't realize how much until I spoke to her.

 

     "I guess my schedule is open," she returned. Finally, she turned her eyes on me, the corners of her mouth tugging into a smile, despite her grim circumstance. "Can we get a drink first?"